Friday, October 28, 2016

Friday Misery - old fashioned cocktail party

One part ice. Two parts bitters. Two parts ginger syrup. Four parts bourbon.

Now. Let's do this.

Washed ashore on the northern bank of the St. Johns river, I was dizzy and disoriented. Twice I attempted to rise, just to my knees, but gravity easily overpowered me and my face came crashing back down to Earth.

As I lay there, exhausted and despondent, I thought to myself, “This is what losing three of four feels like.” The shame was just too thick to slice through and even days later the memories would not relent.

Botched assignments. Overblown egos. Poor execution. Laziness. Poor decisions.

We had embraced the wrong tenets and got caught believing better of ourselves. Against inferior opponents you can sometimes survive, but not on a day when they wanted it so much more. So I was left to drift listlessly towards the next destination, the next moment of judgment, with nothing to tend to my wounds except time and the marsh water of the River’s lower basin.

Night was falling. In the distance I could hear the motorized sounds from the expressway. But I could not see the lights because my eyes had grown too heavy.

Goddamn Vanderbilt,was my last thought before I passed out.

Down. But not out.
By dawn the realization that this territory was not unchartered only intensified. The pain continued to be persistent, but hope can be an incredible analgesic.

And I saw you there too, as well as the others. As the Sun crested over Exchange Island we realized our strength in numbers. We were fortified by our position. I looked deep into your eyes and you mine, and we both saw a familiar resolve.

Chubb’s knee. Gurley and AJ benched. Third and Grantham. Fourth and Willie. The Independence Bowl. 2008 Blackout. Quincy in Columbia. Kevin Ramsey’s year. Ray Goff minus 1993.

We have seen some shit man. We have traversed this rickety bridge. To just stop and not move forward is to give up. You, me, Kirby, his players, we’re just not wired that way. To see the top we must endure the cold, dark valley.

Better days are ahead and these struggles will only make them that much sweeter. So we dust ourselves off and set our bearings. There is much work to be done.

The sweet salve of a WLOCP win.
Yes, some have chosen not to bear arms. The fight has lost them and they are no longer propelled to join our side. They’re the same ones that missed Nat Hudson throwing that block in 1980. Lindsay ran and ran, but not before their eyes. Instead they sobbed quietly in a corner after shutting the television off.

They know not how to see a fight through to the end. Their drawers are too tight and their grits are watery. Whether that is a result of their own personality flaws or poor parental influence when they were younger, is not our place to dwell in. Perhaps they only chewed crayons in kindergarten instead of their teacher showing them the beauty that could come forth from the waxy, vivid Crayola box.

Their only hope is that we circle the wagons in their absence. Have mercy they just need to be turned toward the light!

There was a point in time when players like Bobo, Edwards, Smart, and Champ decided they were just goddamned tired of taking the beating. No one gave those guys a chance against a Spurrier team that was the defending national champion and reloaded with talent. But those Dawgs didn’t back down and they certainly didn’t worry about those that had given up on them.

Same can be said of the 2004 team, as well as the teams in 2007 and 2012. They weren’t worried about Florida’s ranking and their streak in Jacksonville. They didn’t bother with supporters who had left their team’s colors at the bottom of the laundry pile. They didn’t concern themselves with fanatics that had only become fanatical about bitching and moaning more than hunkering down and Glory Glory.

Brothers, sisters...the fight continues on tomorrow. Together we cross onto Gator Bowl Blvd and populate the lots along Duval and Tallyrand. Many others will join us in spirit, a cocktail in their hand and some grit left in their belly. We’ll join hands and we’ll watch the team bus approach. We’ll embolden those players’ attitude and we’ll pledge our support through to the end.

We must focus on that which is within our control, which means recognizing that the very vocal minority may not be swayed. But that doesn’t mean that our colors change. It doesn’t mean that we can’t pump our fists into the cool evening air when Sony Michel battles for a first down. It doesn’t mean that we can’t enjoy the absolute pleasure of being a Georgia Bulldog fan on a Saturday night.

Because win or lose, it is an absolute pleasure. Having endured so many losses together, we can stomach the possibility of one more while summoning forth the very voice intent on preventing it.

As Larry Munson and God as my witness, I look forward to looking back on the banks of the St. Johns tomorrow and smiling. Together we washed ashore broken and battered. And together we will walk away having seen players like Lorenzo, Atkins, Payne, Sony, and Chubb experience the utter joy of winning in Jacksonville.

Finally. Again. Go Dawgs y’all!

Now, let us pray...dear Lord please protect us from this enemy race and let the ice in our drinks have the will of Nat Hudson and the fortitude of Robert Edwards. First downs for Glory! Amen.

Wednesday, October 26, 2016

Darth Gators using the force fail

Now don't get me wrong, I hate them. But Lord Almighty gator fans sure are funny sometimes.

Take this guy...

That's Side Visor Darth Jorts. He's powered by Zima and spends most of the game tracking the cameras on the sideline rather than the game itself. On Fridays his mom makes him tater tots.

And this guy, Jar Jar Boinks. He majored in toy collecting, but never completed his degree. He's an assistant manager at a comic book store and only paid $75 for this custom costume. Unfortunately he paid $230 for this faulty light saber on craigslist.

Different is a good thing

Because we all remember what last year in Jax smelled like.

Monday, October 24, 2016

Patrick, Smith test negative...which is positive news for Dawg fans.

Last week's details of a search of Natrez Patrick's dorm room have been lingering in the air as the team prepares for its annual clash with Florida in Jacksonville. Both Patrick and Roquan Smith were tested after the search and the results were announced this morning.
So, the team's leading tacklers will be in uniform and that's certainly welcome news. The players likely won't escape punishment for the circumstances leading to the search as well as the admission that a drink bottle with a hidden department was used for hiding marijuana.

But lucky for Georgia, that's a bridge to cross after the team bus rumbles down Gator Bowl Boulevard.

Saturday, October 22, 2016

From one week ago to one week from today

Dear Fragile Georgia Fan,

One week from right now we all heard the cries. We were practically in unison. It all sucked, and it was so, so painful. Even though we came into September knowing we'd face some growing pains we didn't know it'd cost us a Homecoming game against Vanderbilt.


But then you went a bridge too far. Woke up Sunday to some saying they'd be back when Kirby had a chance to get his own players. Many of y'all even said you were done completely; you can longer stand the thought of standing alongside the rest of us.

Good riddance. Because what lies ahead is not for the feint of heart or those who can't unwind their panties in time to put on their big boy britches.

One week from right now we play Florida. If you're not down there with me and the team and the rest of the real fans, I hope you tune in and hunker down with your big screen tv. I hope you'll join me as just a guy that can never give up on his team. A guy that believes you endure the hard times to enjoy the good.

I didn't become a dad just to cheer when my kid scores a goal. I didn't become a dad just to be there when my kid walks across the stage at graduation. I became a dad to see them through the lows so that they can get back up and walk forward again.

Similarly, I didn't become a Georgia fan just to pick and choose which seasons I wear red. I didn't become a Georgia fan to see the teams compete only during championship games. I want to hurt so I can truly feel the joy. I want to withstand the storm so that the Sun is that much brighter.

If you're as ready for the last five games as you were the first six, let's join hands. If you're not done whining and you'd like another few weeks to finish your self-pity smoothie...well, we'll see you whenever you find a chinstrap that snaps tight enough.

Go Dawgs!

Friday, October 21, 2016

The Dynamic Jorted Duo

As Lenny and Ricky Earl embarked on their sixth and eighth year respectively at the University of Florida, both studying herbivology and the science of cardboard cases as coolers...

Lenny - "Bro...I got the Nattys just like Urban!"

Ricky Earl - "Haha! And hey, bring your jeans cuz momma said we could use the scissors!"

Thursday, October 20, 2016

"Pop, why won't Will Grier bunt?!?"

Bob and his youngest son Bobby Dean Joe bought tickets to a Florida baseball game, only they didn't know two things: 1) how to spell baseball, and 2) that baseball season was over a month away from it's season's start.

They weren't sure what kind of game they ended up watching, but they did their best trying to get the guy with the weird looking ball to steal third.

Help a Gator Hater out

Do you know someone that needs to hate the gators more? Well, then show them this website and help a UGA student earn some extra credit for his class before the WLOCP

Go Dawgs!

Tuesday, October 18, 2016

"We're going to keep getting better and try to win out."

I don't know about you, but the fact that two of the team's juniors - Nick Chubb and Lorenzo Carter - provide the player quotes for this article does me some good.
“I hope it’s a tough few weeks,” junior outside linebacker Lorenzo Carter said. “I plan on pushing our players. The leadership is going to push our players and if you’re not ready to respond then that’s going to be a rough two weeks for you. We’re going to come out in these two weeks and work. That’s all we can do is grind.”
Practicing mad might not be a bad thing. That and maybe bring Shawn Williams back for a few speeches the next couple weeks. Worked a few years back leading up to the WLOCP.

Monday, October 17, 2016

Remember. We're now "those" fans. Act like it.

Just as we're beyond tired of the ill-gotten 2007 Alabama analogy, I'm also tired of one other talking point that I'm hearing a lot this season, but especially after Saturday's loss.

But first I want to say that losing to Vanderbilt at home in no way completely sours my view of the program's direction. I believe the change we made last December, while it may not have come due in my eyes at the time, was what was best for all involved. Kirby can get us there, but we knew it wasn't going to happen overnight.

That said, since we made the change, using phrases like "Calm down, it's going to take some time" or "Hey, Kirby just needs some more players" is way off the mark.

Once we said ten wins wasn't good enough we became that program. We became the fans that expect to win each and every Saturday. So losing to Vanderbilt does not and should not evoke a sense of calm. Mostly because even though Kirby may not have all the players he needs to get us to Atlanta, he certainly has enough of them to win that game Saturday.

Many are expecting to lose to Florida. I get that. Losing three of the last four games will do that to you. But it's not in my makeup and I doubt it's the kind of mindset that a true championship program would tolerate much.

The bar has been set high and we need to get used to seeing it up there above our fingers yet still desperately reaching to grasp a hold. Kirby knew this when he took the job and he'd probably be the first to tell you that the time is now. It's Attack the Day not Get ready to attack in another couple years...hopefully.

In short, we're still a winning program that aspires to be a championship program. The difference is that ten months ago we pushed all our chips to the center of the table. So it's a new era. We need to start acting like it.