Monday, March 9, 2009

Monday's Meatloaf - Diddy's Horse is One Race Closer to Glue

Warm up that oven before you get your hands all raw with meat...

This weekend Bernie was once again reminded how lucky the Bulldog Nation is to have CMR at the helm. He always seems to have his finger on the pulse of the program. 

The NCAA has handed down the following penalties to Florida State University's tackle football program:

*Four years probation
*Loss of six scholarships
*and the vacation of wins in which ineligible athletes were competing

In all, ten athletic programs were affected by what the NCAA referred to as "major violations". In terms of the football penalties, FSU self-imposed and agreed with all but one...any guess which? Yup! You're right, they insist they didn't knowingly put players on the field that didn't come by music appreciation knowledge on their own. In all, FSU could vacate (not exactly a forfeit, just no longer able to claim) 14 victories.

Diddy's finger couldn't be further away from FSUs palpitation (h/t the distinguished Senator Blutarksy). Since Richt left Tallahassee, Bowden hasn't been doing too well. Wins have been harder to come by. Recruits not as enamored with the Free Shoes product. Bowden's son and heir apparent went from offensive coordinator to coaching at North Alabama (I looked that up, it's not Tennessee...) Not only has the new hip'd Paterno surpassed Bowden's career win total, but he stands to begin the 2009 season as much as 15 wins up.

So if this were a horse race between Diddy and JoePa it would have finished the '08 season with...and DOWN the stretch they come!...neck and neck. But suddenly Bowden has pulled up lame...

And in Other News

  • The Diamond Dawgs are now a perfect 12-0 after (yawn!) ANOTHER sweep. Holy mackeral! That's five opponents, 12 wins, no losses, 139 runs, 44 runs against. This weekend's victim was the Quinnipiac Bobcats. They are now on their way back to Connecticut and Perno's All-Stars are preparing to tie the longest win streak in his era. Tuesday brings a two-game series against LeMoyne, the last non-conference opponent before SEC play begins, Friday in Tuskeeloosie.
  • The men's basketball team finished the regular season...whew!
  • As predicted, my 5 year olds dominated their season opener in soccer Saturday. You can dress em up real cute in pink shin guards and matching hair bows, but throw a ball on the pitch and it's GO time. Seriously it was like watching Utah play Alabammy in the Sugar Bowl...yeh, that bad.
  • Herschel survived another board room appearance. You know, I find Tom Green humorous. And he actually has stood in Sanford stadium before (movie RoadTrip...UGAs campus  was the scenic backdrop of a fictional University of Ithaca). But last night he was obnoxious. I wish he had agreed to fight Herschel. That would have been more entertaining than he and Hamilton making a set. Ugh! Of course if Green doesn't shut up! when 34 says so, it may just happen. 
  • And would it kill Trump to put a quick shot of the Georgia G in the opening to the show? The Heisman trophy gets some face time...what about Uga? Bill Bates? or just a shot of Walker going airborn against the goldendomers?
  • Question for the day: is there a person as tough as Trump's ego and as graceful as his combover? YES. And her name is the GymDogs. This time the scene was at Pauley Pavilion in LA. Behind Courtney McCool's perfect 10 on the beam and another all-around title for Kupets, the ladies spanked UCLA 197.725-196.125. The home fianle (Yoculan's last meet at Stegeman) is Saturday against Michigan.
  • You know how when you were dating that person and at some point you put the relationship under the microscope and realize it's more of a pimple than a picnic? A few months later nothing's changed and after beating your head against the wall repeatedly something finally rattles into place and you pull the trigger (figuratively!....who do you think I am?) and end it? Well, that my friends is how Jerry Jones and Tony Romo feel this week. [cue Johnny Nash....]
  • And don't feel too bad for TO (I can see clearly now the rain is gone....). He's already found his new BFF in Trent Edwards/city of Buffalo. (I can see all obstacles in my way....)

And one BIG shout-out to my little (almost...) five year old Ainsley. She discovered last week that one of her little classmates has been bred as a gator. The little tebow lovers' punishment (in my own angel's words): So I don't play with her on the playground anymore. I only play with Georgia Bulldogs. I see a solid post-secondary education in your future Ainsley. Not to mention a hotfudge sundae.

It's gonna be a bright bright bright bright...sun-shiney day! 

Here's your lunch reader. Stick a fork in it. 



Mackie said...

Actually, I believe Herschel told Tom Green to "SHET UP!" first reaction was to wonder if the FCC had missed a bleep.

Bernie said...

Good catch Mackie! And he actually told him to "Shet up!" twice.

Cuz that's how they roll in Wrightsville!!