As of week nine, we'd never had a female winner in ThursdaysRTrivial. And in the ten weeks since its inception, we'd never had a back to back winner. Well gentlemen, @allyugadawg has laid said gauntlet down on your big toe. She correctly answered that Bobby Reid was the plaYah Coach Gumby was "defending" during his temper tantrum. Enjoy the T Boone autographed windmill Ally!! (check out Ally's latest blog post HERE)
If his work ever gives him a moment of free time, @alanashley will be a force to be reckoned with. He chimed in with the answer as well and stuck around to add the bonus - Jenni Carlson is the crappy journalist who was spat upon. Honorable mentions to @clayfill and Twitter newcomer @hamptanner for their trivial knowledge. You each take home a bail bondsman on retainer, courtesy of Coach Gundy.
Tailgate Predictions - take these to the bank, you'll thank me later
First and foremost, Dawgs 34 'pokes 13
GameyChickens 7 'pack 3 (just making sure you're paying attention)
Hokies go all Louisiana Monroe on Bama's ass
GA Tech bounces back from the LSwho beatdown and beats J'ville State by double digits.
USC (the real one) eludes San Jose St. as if they were NCAA investigators
Charlie Weis burns 18.6 calories beating Nevada
And lastly, Bernie tells some dude in chaps to get on all fours and bark like a DAWG!!
If you're a southern college football fan who's stepped into a stadium on a Saturday, you know that no other sport contains the passion and fervent desire that NCAA football does.
We whupp'd the cowgirls once. Two years ago they pranced in from a town we'd never even heard of with their glorified sissy-boy offense designed to finesse points outta the scoreboard. From what I remember the visitors left by the time the clock struck 10:00 in the second quarter. They were doing the hokey-pokey in the mid-west by the time we all got back to the tailgate.
Mr. Pickens...Good rodeos last 8 seconds...football, 60 minutes.
Now it's our turn to travel. The place is Stillwater. A town that wasn't even on the map until a YouTubeesque tirade two years ago placed it there. There's evidently a university there too that supports their team. And by university I mean megalo-millionaire with his own locker. Jim Dandy!
A singular Fat Bankroll is nice when you compete with other nancyboys, but this is the SEC by God! Our Dawgs have the undying support of an entire nation. It's a nation that follows every move, lives and dies with every play, cries for joy everytime Michael Johnson swiftly gathers in that carefully lofted pass, twists momentarily before gingerly getting each cleat down twice in a Jordan-Hare endzone.
This isn't about some big-headed mascot sporting a pistol and an orange hat. It's about the greatest mascot ever hiking his hindleg o'er the spur in your "cowboy's" boot. We've all had from January 2nd until now to take care of us. I've got me straightened out. We've looked inward long enough, we've been self-centered because that's what the off-season is for.
That was then this is NOW. When the Volunteers left us just mere seconds to win in Knoxville, we came together and broke their nose, we just crushed their face. When 60 minutes wasn't enough time in Tuscaloosa, we joined hands for a one and done. And the last time we were supposed to be skeer'd of some Big XII offense we punched that cowpoke in the mouth.
They think some 60K seat stadium is gonna strike fear in our hearts? PuhLEEZE!! If you're in Stillwater Reader, I better hear ya BARK!! If you're cheering from afar, I can't wait to see you next weekend, 'tween the hedges.
Whether you agree with the AFCAs suggestion of a handshake or not, you have to admit Gundy is taking some moderate sized PR shots this week. His team, as @credendinosaid last night, is "falling apart" it seems. A starting TE leaves his helmet on the field, more arrests than the defending nat'l chumpions, plus the little matter of gentlemanly refusal....it all adds up to a growing saturation in the crotch area of our favorite MAN.
Was wandering around the internets last night and read this tongue in cheek preview of the Okie Pokies (h/t PWD). Mr. T-Bone...I guess you get what you pay for.
Back to the handshake issue...I side with Quinton. As much respect as I have for what our QB is telling us, when you have the opportunity to show that you are above the game itself and perhaps teach some younger fans (maybe even older ones) what sport is about...well, just do it.
Who knew Baylor @ Wake Forest was such a draw? If you're greenwith envy...call your local affiliate and simply ask - WTF??
Lastly, make sure you wear your college colors tomorrow for College Colors Day. But also make sure you leave an appropriately RED shirt ready for gameday. Black won't work Saturday (h/t @ThinkingBulldog)
Now that we know who'll be playing the Dawgs in the Dome this December, let's take a looksee at who's gnaw'd bones will be scattered around the junkyard.
KenYucky - Keep in mind that the off-season extends into November for our friends up in horse country. Football is just an appetizer to whatever shenanigans new round ball coach John Calipari has in store. However, the Big Blue Faithful are purring over a couple of JUCOs that join Coach Brooks' squad in Lexington. I don't care if they're both blackbelts, it's Shreveport or bust. My money's on bust.
Oh Vandy- ...well you came and you gave without taking...Our friends in Nashville have a quarterback named, but are still about as consequential to the SEC landscape as Barry Manilow was to Rock and Roll. On their behalf, it's hard to be a plaYah when you share the locker room with the Fine Arts department. They'll steal their usual game from somebody...but Bobby Johnson isn't enough of a wild and crazy guy to make too much of a splash.
Rocky Flops - It seems like years ago that Philmer stepped down and was paraded (out) and serenaded (angrily). Hard to believe Kiffykins is heading into his first SEC start. He may not be nervous, but his tail's gonna be sore well before our beloved Dawgs' visit. The voWels may bowl, but it doesn't look like enough pins to score three digits.
Free Range, but Little Gamey- Turns out that the Dawgs aren't the only SEC team brushing up on chemistry this off-season. Sure, we can all agree that chicken tastes good, but the processed poultry coming from the armpit of the south historically, is gamey and not easy to digest. Another year, another plate of insignificant, plain ol' chicken.
Gradulations are in Order- It's hard to believe an incoherent congresswoman (oxymoronic, no?) could bring so much accountability to college football's favorite program. For years, gayturds have been running amuck, stealing dead people's credit and other tomfoolery only to be slapped on the hand. But now that gradulations are in order, Slurbie is cracking the whip. All Dustin Doe did was plead guilty to two misdemeanors and now he has to sit against Charleston Southern. OUCH!!
Back on the field, these reptiles will cruise into October still basking in the glow of all things Bristol. Should they survive a trip to Baton Rouge and Starkville, the loss to the Dawgs will be even mo better. Tebow may start in Jacksonville, but he won't finish.
Yeh...I said it! Enjoy sunny Orlando punks. Mess wit' us again and Orson'll break more than your crystal.
Kings of the Junkyard- One Team, One Goal. This team will be special. There may be a loss in there somewhere, but I'll be damned if I can point my finger at it. Yeh, it's a far cry from the days when you could highlight the Saturdays on the skedYule when you knew an extra fifth was gonna be needed. Now we just restock the depth chart and lace em up.
I truly believe this defense will rise to the occasion each and every Saturday. I've come a long way since Asher said he was leaving. Of the three to choose the draft, I thought his departure would hurt the most. While that still may be true, I have faith.
Join me. Maybe it's the anxiousness of College Football Season's eve talking. Maybe I'm just a big ol' Homer. But it's gonna be special.
Last week I detailed the three impact players I feel are the most important in the three phases of Georgia football this season. I promised South FL Dawg I'd come back to the newbies, so here goes.
Offense - Rantavious Wooten
Look...I know what you're saying. I too am a BIG believer in Orson. He's gonna turn some heads and he's gonna crush some souls. Marlon Brown has the tools to put together a season of stats that would rival those of AJs last season.
But Wooten's been my ball carrier since NSD '09. I like the kid's skillz. He breaks ankles, he attacks the ball, he's fast, he's slippery when cleated, he runs crisp routes, he's got great vision and he's very versatile. About the only thing he doesn't have that Marlon has is a higher altitude. And about the only thing he hasn't done that Charles has is shatter Slurban's crystal ball.
For a moment I want you to picture this: Cox, Lynch and Samuel jogging to the sideline and slapping the hands of Gray, Charles and Wooten as they jog towards the huddle. Welcome to our landscape, Mr. Change of Pace. PWDs Grayhound in living color. Somewhere in a press box...Bobo grins.
Defense - Branden Smith
Really wanted to go with Reuben Faloughi here, but it sounds like his chances of cracking the rotation at d-end are slim. What a great story though.
Martinez says Smith's athletic ability and strong work ethic have assured him of valuable playing time. The defensive back out of Booker T. Washington will see action at corner most likely in nickel situations as it appears Martinez will opt to put Prince Miller over the slot.
It's only natural that Smith is behind in development of players like Miller and Boykin, but the fact that he hasn't been left behind by the likes of Commings and Cuff is a sign that the kid came to camp ready to play....and grow.
Via Hale's Blog where he assesses each freshman's chances at '09 action, CMR on Smith: "He can recover extremely fast...Instead of recovering and trying to strip the ball out, he might be in position for an interception."
Thank you sir may I have another? The writing is on the wall that we could see Branden Smith more and more frequently as the season wears on.
Special Teams - Brandon Bogotay
This could also go to Mr. Smith as he should get some opportunities to field a kicked ball and attempt to evade opposing jerseys running at a high rate of speed.
But place-kicking is a hot-button issue, is it not?
It still sounds doubtful that Bogotay is going to wrestle away the kicking duties from Walsh, but just the fact that this kid from sunny Cali is on campus is impactful enough. Think back to Walsh's first kickoff as a Dawg and how it sailed into the endzone. Fans cheered as if the feat counted for points to be added to the scoredboard. It all seemed so promising...only to lead to so much disappointment.
Fans are tired of half-assed performances after television TOs. They're ready for consistency, hang-time and kicks across or in the nearest possible vicinity of the opponents' goal line. Coach Fabris can scowl all he wants, but CMR spent an extra scholly on someone who can do just those things we're asking for.
So if Bogotay can get us past the 20 yard line without any little yellow flags, whether as a direct result of his foot or an indirect result...well, I'll take it!
Instead of working on the honey-do list this past weekend, took a trip to the folks for some really good food...and an opportunity to drive Bernie's Dawgmobile through urranjah hotbeds like Easley, Greenville and Clempson.
If you were not already aware, I am the product of an IPTAY marriage. Luckily my parents had enough sense to raise me in Athens. I tell them it was so Child Protective Services would get off of their backs. They say it was so Dad could get his doctorate from a real school.
Or something like that... Regardless, I guess the main thing is - to this day I have yet to drive a tractor, the preferred mode of transport in and around upstate SC.
The visit this weekend reminded me of going for a visit several years ago. The 2002 season opener brought my dad's kittens to town, only to limp away after DJ and Billybroke their hearts. It was especially sweet for me cuz as I left our tailgate to head for Sanford, I had called my folks to give them what the final score would be.
Do you know who Billy Bennett is Dad? Well, you will. Dawgs 31 Tigers 28.
The next Saturday we headed over Lake Hartwell for a visit. As we drove through Pendleton the Tiger Traffic got real thick. They had a noon start, so we were backed up in traffic full of Tiger Rags on their way to touch that rock. To give you the full visual, we were the sore thumb sitting comfortably in our red and black truck with flags at full Glory.
At one point, I tried to motion a lady into the lane in front of me. I was raised to be gentlemanly and she had been sitting there for a good 5 minutes at least. I was sure her potato salad was within moments of spoiling a tailgate somewhere near Tillman Hall. And we were in no rush as the Dawgs didn't kick off in Chickumbia until mid-afternoon (you remember...when David Pollack proved he only needed one left hand to corral his 3rd career INT).
Maybe had Clempson won the contest 'tween the hedges the previous week she would've just given me the finger and laughed. But all she could manage on this Saturday morning was to look away in disgust and refuse my generous offer.
And luckily I didn't have to count on her for a ticket the following year when the Dawgs went to Clempson. Mom gave me hers so I could sit next to dad and witness a real 30-0 thumping that included another Pollack INT. David Pollack just saved our whatchamacallit!
Besides, I bet that lady Tiger's potato salad sucked.
Remember back in 2001 when Coach Richt came into town with a new attitude and laid down the guantlet? Q-Dawg left on the first bus outta the Broad St Greyhound terminal. Fans heard rumblings of the new off-season workouts with the grueling mat drills. I don't know about you, but personally...I smiled.
Do you recall any players going all Headline News behind the CMRs back and complaining? Do you remember Boss Bailey or Jon Stinchcomb telling anyone with a Press pass that Van Halanger was just a big ol' meanie?
The answer is no. It really wasn't until October when one Hobnail Bootstomped away two decades of misery for the Dawgs in Knoxville that a realization set in for both fans and players.
"These guysreallyloveeachother, care about each other and will fight for each other," said Coach Richt back in Knoxville 2001. "There's just an unbelieveable chemistry on this team."
Given the opportunity to reflect back later on, CMR pointed to that game as the time his new players finally bought into his system. They then understood the spoils they could enjoy should they put in all the effort their coaches were asking of them.
It's not really news that a program has players who train and practice more than the NCAA "allows". But it's BIG news when the story originates from inside the locker room from currentand former players. If it is found that Coach Rod assigned practice times to players outside of the authority on the NCAA, Michigan will face consequences.
But believe me when I say, that the bigger issue is that Coach Rod has players who have not bought into his system. They're upset at having to work too hard which is sad. They're talking to people outside the locker room about IT which is pathetic.
I guess hanging within a FG of Toledo last season wasn't enough to help them appreciate Coach Rod's system. Meanwhile, Dawg fans can be very thankful to have a coach who has the respect of his players and instills a strong work ethic...by strapping on a hobnail boot if necessary.
Is the myth that Mark Richt of UGA is on the hotseat the greatest myth in college football?
Was catching up on some podcasts over the weekend and Maisel's is one I typically enjoy. I findBeano Cook hilarious almost any time I tune into his voice and he always has a knack for making the college football fan appreciate the sport's heritage.
That and he's more than slightly off kilter. Which is usually pretty fun.
But this time Maisel asked Beano to list the three coaches who would find themselves on the hotseat this season. Just two minutes after picking NotHer Dame to go to the BCS Championship Game, he said that Charlie Weis would lead the list (Huh??). And he also gave me Al Groh. Easy enough.
Then forced into a third pick Beano went with Richt. So I'm now convinced Beano sleeps withFinebaum and drinks HI-C spiked with grain alcohol from Lou Holtz's sippy cup. Truly, what more evidence do you need?
I'm well aware that there are some of you who are vastly dissatisfied with CMR. He hasn't won the Mythical National Championship. He hasn't beaten Meyer consistently. He doesn't ride around Athens in a soup'd up Camaro with AC/DC blaring Hell's Bells on Christmas Eve.
What evs. When I was skipping classes to shoot pool at Tate it was to forget for a few hours thatRay Goof was the program's figurehead. Coach Richt is the perfect man for the job in Athens. He's done more for Georgia football than anyone since Erskine Russell left for Statesboro. And he doesn't wear those obnoxiously huge glasses with the throwback cap.
And he WILL win a Nat'l Championship...sooner rather than later. And if Orson Charles drops this one like he did Slurban's, I just hope it falls directly on Beano's foot.
Well, I'm certainly not one of the Big Dawgs...but I am ashamed that I missed this Noops Dawg video post over at Dancing in the Endzone. It's really a fantastic way to get into the spirit of what awaits us this season.
Read a lot of College Football Preview material yesterday. I enjoyed this piece by Weiszerthe best. It's back to basics in Athens. And the floriDuh AD admits that one day the luck of the gayturd will end.
While I was in upstate SC this weekend, picked up this update on Jon Richt.
So...if Cowboys are doing the OkiePokie at the end of the game Saturday night, T-Bone (h/t Hale) will realize a return on his investment. But if they go undefeated and earn a trip to a BCS bowl...he'll need a pair of Depends. Makes sense. Herschel could still generate more energy than ten of Pickens' windmills.
I'd like to thank the folks for the hospitality this weekend. You know, for a couple IPTAYers...they're alright. They even watched the kids for an afternoon while the lady and I went to see The Hangover...finally.
Somewhere in a theater in Greenville there is a skinny white ass....cuz I laughed it off Reader. If you haven't seen it (the movie, not the hindquarters) do yourself a favor.
If nothing else my trip to Clempson learned me yet another thing about Tigers....they love pepper. But hate Cinnamon.
Take a slice of that Reader and put it on some Wonderbread. A little mayo, a slice of provolone...meatloaf sandwich = lunch!