Friday, November 6, 2009

Who's That Comin'...Home!

I've always found cupcakes to be quite comforting...

Studio Analysis

Joe Cox is starting. Some sharp dressed undergrads will be named King and Queen. Mike Bobo will carry his chart along the sideline. Caleb King is starting. Bryan Evans will surely start. Willie Martinez will put both thumbs in the air. So all across the Bulldog Nation fans are coming to grips with the decisions they have no control over.

Perhaps more importantly, I'm preparing myself for all the empty seats at kickoff. Then again, like I said yesterday...some of these jackholes will be asking for their seats back soon.

On the field however, this should be a yawner. I say should because under different circumstances this would be no more than a walk thru at least, an exhibition game at most. But our Dawgs are a flawed team that must do work Saturday.

As Groo mentioned the other day, a heated contest looms. A loss to AwwBarn at home, at night, on big-time TV...would weigh pretty heavy in the balance for a season that can't seem to lift out of a sharp descent.

Some fans are lashing out, some are already more interested in NFL Scores. As for me, I'm like you Reader. I'll be there to see what the intensity is like, how Wooten and Brown do withGreen in street clothes, what Logan Gray does when not thrown to the wolves, what the rotation is like in the secondary, some more sick kicks by Blair and Drew...and to show my little girls once again the awesomeness that is Sanford Stadium.

That's right...I've got two dates for Homecoming. It ain't all bad.

Dawgs (name their score)

Golden Eagles 10

Tailgate Predictions
  • The Hat pulls one of those signature wins out of his fanny just like the good old days. But the real excitement in this one will always be the post-game shake.
  • Wake Forest has insisted on wearing the white jerseys when they travel to NATS, supposedly because it will be easier to surrender.
  • Who has the bigger leader at QB, Penn State or Ohio State? I'll go with PSU.
  • Spikes sits. Slurban walks and every Vandy player wears eye no avail.
  • Al Groh's status as head Wahoo will be evaluated at the end of the season. Miami makes said evaluation a means to an end.
  • I remember as a kid when Nebraska/Oklahoma was the corn-fed Super Bowl. Late Saturday night, one of them will collect their 4th loss. I'll take Boomer-Sooner.
  • And if that's not enough for you, check out some Vegas Football Picks with an NFL flair.

Trivial Update
Q - Who was last year's Homecoming King and Queen?
A - Beau Gilmore as King and Bailey Simpson as Queen.

I vaguely remembered giving these two a shout-out in last year's post-Homecoming write-up. So I thought this would be information that would prove challenging when trying to find. Once again I underestimated the @allyugadawg databanks. For answering so effortlessly and taking another two-point lead over Mackie, Ally takes home a used Can Willie Cuz He Can't float, complete with motorized can opener.

Enjoy the parade evrybotty! And make sure to wipe the frosting from your lip other side.


Thursday, November 5, 2009

Vultures vs Vermin, a debate in depravity

What's worse: a person or thing that preys, esp greedily or unscrupulously OR an objectionable or obnoxious person?

Sitting at 4-4, many of the issues circling the Georgia football program have been brought on itself. When a team wins, seats on the bandwagon are so few even pregnant women and the elderly must stand. And when said team loses...well, the vitriol is especially caustic.

As a UGA alum and avid supporter of UGA Athletics, I don't feel as if I need to wait for a seat to open on the wagon. And as good as that feels, the disgust I feel when the student-athletes are thrown into a fire that's in front of a moving North-South bus after losing a game is enough to make me evaluate who I choose to sit beside at games, who I talk to at tailgates and who I follow on Twitter.

Talk is cheap. And there are men and women who have paid the ultimate sacrifice to provide me the opportunity to express my opinions in a free fashion. However, in the end my opinion is worth no more than the most recent idiot desperate for some attention.

But personally, my dignity is worth all the gold in Fort Knox. And I take my responsibilities as a Dawg fan seriously. Neither will be compromised. I've been a fan for longer than some douchebags have been alive and I pay for my seat on Saturdays like 92000 others. So I reserve the right to criticize.

And God knows coaches make enough money nowadays to take a little heat. But to call out players, to question their personal choices as if you have run a suicide in their shoes or dove for a loose ball at the bottom of a hungry scrum in their helmet...that's classless.

Now I don't wanna just come across as Archie singing Those Were the Days, but I guess today's society accepts such cowardly drivel as journalism. In truth, it's nothing more than a scavenger hoping to find a loose bone; a bald headed buzzard jonesin' for its next carcass.

For God's sake, these young men are playing a game. Exactly what the hell are you doing?

Hiding behind your twitter account? Collecting a paycheck for a dying paper that is so desperate for clicks you'll even pander to the thirty-three nerds that read your column? Or are you a student editor of the campus paper who climbs to the top of the growing discontent to try and scream a little louder than the rest?

Pathetic. Mike warned you twits who profess to be Dawg fans to watch yourself. I'll admit I had to check my own frustration and evaluate my own behavior whether I'm on the road wearing my red cap, in my living room with my cup of bourbon or within Sanford Stadium with my friends.

And it was no casual glance in the mirror Reader. It was a long difficult stare. That loss on Rocky Flop cut me deep.

But to criticize a student-athlete for competing in a losing effort just because they also ate at Burger King earlier that week or use PlayStation to unwind...check yourself brother. To call out the team for going downtown like a large portion of the rest of the student-body on a Saturday night just because you chose to stay home and type more worthless crap while soaking in a bath of jealousy...well, how proud the AJC would be to hire you.

Peas in a pod and all that...

Vultures versus vermin..?? Both get giddy during turbulent times and relish the idea of leading a lynch mob. The vultures impact may be greater, the vermin may strike closer to the heart. But I would argue, both are deplorable. Worthless. Let em keep typing and circle overhead. Let em keep tweeting and scurrying into corners.

By this time next year they'll be clamoring for their seat back.

I made the somewhat easy decision not to link the objectionable material of certain AJC columnists and Red and Black editors (or Blue and Orange as #95 likes to say now). If this makes my post more difficult for you to follow I apologize. But I refuse to be a whore to their internet traffic hits.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Locker Notes for the Swamp Thugs

Turns out Willard was only able to get a couple of these put up before someone saw right through his disguise, an orange jumpsuit with Alachua County Corrections scribbled on the back with a black sharpie.

Who knew they actually had to stitch the lettering on all of those...?? Just hope they can read Willard's hand"writing". He'd had a few...

  • Brandon Spikes - Whether it was Knowshon Jr givin' your boy the facial or playing without a properly attached helmet that got your panties in a wad...the way I see it you got two options: sprout a pair or go ahead and complete the sex change Pusqualee.
  • Corch - You remind me of my third grade teacher Miss Wretched. Loose morals, bad hair and possessor of a signed contract with Lucifer Von Beelzebub. 'Cept she didn't sleep with Commish Slive to gain credibility. Did your Heisman Honey snip you too?
  • Tebow - Judging from your comments...I think you're taking an eye for an eye too literally Sleezbow. The jort wearin' inbreds could use better leadership.
  • Brandon James - I've seen peewees that coulda caught that ball and scored. URRRPP! Hope the shat stains came outta your britches.
The good news is when Willard stopped on the way out to relieve himself of extra weight near the Kleenex Memorial, he found a pair of jorts and a wifebeater. So if you have any of these you'd like to add, I might be able to get him to take one for the team and infiltrate the lizards' den again.

Locker Notes - Tennessee Tech

The opponent isn't sexy...but it's Homecoming and we could really use a win. And good news Reader...Willard has been able to infiltrate the vile enemy's locker room. So be sure to come back later to add a few for the '09 SEC East Chumps.
  • Washaun Ealey - Good work Saturday. Appreciate that you took the high road as it relates to Eye Gouge Gate. Still think Spikes is a worthless piece of (synonym for livestock feces). But appreciate the class and dignity you roll with.
  • Joe Cox - I sure hope you get the luxury of playing with a lead Saturday. Regardless, it's your turn, your team.
  • Coach Bobo - Turn the pups loose...let's see what they got.
  • AJ Green - what you gotta do to get better.
  • Rennie - Take it easy on these kids Saturday....On second thought...knock some heads around.
  • Coach Richt - At Georgia, we don't quit. I hope fans take that to heart as deeply as the players do.
  • Uga VII - Show some spunk kid. You're getting a bad raputation...
Grab your pen...

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Little Tiny Hairs...big BIG Cause

In the words of Monty Python...And now for something completely different...

A couple of weeks ago I subjected you to my unabashed support for the SCAN Foundation. Time to throw Mackie some love as he has started a group for Movember. Movember is designed to raise both awareness and funds to highlight men's health issues, specifically prostate and testicular cancer.

You can join a team, start your own, donate money...and chunk that razor. That's right, no more little tiny hairs...growin' out your face!!

So for my male reader...give the razor the month off. If your lady or your boss gives you any grief, kindly tell them to eff off (feel free to ad-lib on that one though and insert stronger, more direct language).

And for my female your support as well. Open your wallet...or just steal your husband's credit card. That'll work too.

It's time to kick cancer's ass. Come be a part of it.

This Week's Mumme Poll

Click HERE to get this week's Mumme Poll. Just remember that the results may not be released as of the time of this post.

Finally got to cast the lowly Trojans aside. I've suspected for a while that they were too high on my ballot, but i guess I was waiting on the Ducks to pull the trigger. And boy did they!

Top Five


The Next Seven

Georgia Tech
Penn State
Boise State

Some changes in the top group this week. I moved Florida up because their offense is obviously clicking now. I've watched a lot of them and they may not have the deep threats in Harvin and Murphy, but they still have the versatility to be very dangerous. Plus, their defense is top notch.

The other change at the top is Oregon moving into it. I had them just ahead of Penn State at the bottom last week, but now believe they could play with just about anybody. Definitely Top Five worthy.

So Iowa moved down into the Next Seven. I'm just not inspired by their wins enough to keep them in the Top Five. Other ballots I've seen had Southern Cal nestled in here, but when I looked for a team to put in their stead...well, Oklahoma State has two losses to winning teams. And one of them is putting together an argument for the BCS title game. So despite losing Saturday, I actually voted them in here...but later went back and put Houston in since they have one less loss and beat the Cowboys in Stillwater.

That was a hard decision to make. Overall, this ballot took me longer than the previous few. Feel free to tell me where I screwed up. I could probably use the advice going into next week.

Monday, November 2, 2009

Monday's Meatloaf - A New Season

My feeling, instincts and prognostications (as usual) may have been off. But like I said Friday...we learned a lot about our program Saturday. Today a new season begins that's gonna require introspection, evaluation and a lot of hard work.

This isn't the beginning of a new season that brings the excitement and the anticipation that we feel each August. This isn't the beginning of a new season in which we have all of our goals in front of us.

This is the beginning of a new season in which difficult answers must be found while grappling with the questions that we are currently drowning in. Today a new season begins and the decisions made in the next 70 or so days will determine how soon it will be before we experience jubilation in early November again.

For University of Georgia Athletics, there is no game bigger than the annual cocktail party. The road to Atlanta goes through Jacksonville for the Dawgs...And now that 2007 has become a (very) distant memory, the road back to respectability goes through Duval County as well.

You can't ask for any amount of respect when you're 4-4, you must earn it. Whatever foundation for success that has been built during the Richt era is now washed away. Call it square one, call it a drawing board...whatever it is, we're back at it.

Coach Richt may have enjoyed success at FSU under Diddy with players who ate penalties as if they were Dorito's, but we are not that team. And the SEC is not that conference. Yesterday the wife asked me to verify for her that we had turned the ball over 21 times this season. I looked at her and in all seriousness asked, "Is that all...21 times?"

As bad as it is, it has seemed infinitely worse. We all have differing opinions about what has got us here and what needs to be done to get us (far) away from here. But we all share at least one thing...we all hurt. From the casual fan to the head coach, we hurt down deep.

We had hopes of watching a miracle on the St. Johns and then praying for a way into the Georgia Dome. But today, instead of wondering who else can beat the gators, we're wondering just how we ever won four.

It's a new season Reader...better roll up your sleeves.

Today's Ingredients
  • Do we have to concede that our actual record is now 4-5? Cuz obviously the bye week also whipped us.
  • There's no excuse for having two weeks to prepare only to watch as a struggling offense runs up and down the field in the first quarter.
  • I understand why the media might pressure CMR this week for some clarification of the QB depth chart. But I for one hope he's more concerned with why his good friend is failing his comrades, his fanbase and worst yet, his own players.
  • And I've got a novel idea...when a player draws one of those yellow flags from the refs pocket, kindly yank him from the field. Tough love, truth and consequences...whatever. Moving backwards ain't helping anybody do their job and reach their goals.
  • In his Teleconference Notes, Hale confirms for us that Rogers Redding will once again be at the forefront of conversation this week thanks to Gayturdsville's greatest gangsta thug, Brandon Spikes.
  • Turns out, Ealey's eyes may not have been the only ones Spikes gouged this week.
  • ABHs Ching sees little in the near future to look forward to.
  • PWD is past tired of the costume gimmicks, but naturally rates the issue pretty low on the list of problems. Exhile agrees and would rather attend to the Dawgs' effort.
  • And Rex just wonders...Who Dey?

I know that's a smaller helping than usual Reader. But truth is, I've got more thoughts than I know what to do with this morning. If I can manage to sort through them at some point this week, I plan to have more. It's just not an easy feeling to help your arch enemy into the SECCG.

But I'll leave ya with one thought to ponder, and I'll think you'll agree...

Roll Tide!


Sunday, November 1, 2009

Sunday's Fall Back Thoughts

Admit it forgot to set that clock back last night...

As much as it sucks to wear a pair of jorts with a mustard stain, the team they support does not suck. And we helped them out...handsomely.

Some Stats

  • Penalties - 9 for 87. We kept it under double/triple digits...barely.
  • Turnovers - minus 4. Ugh and double ugh.
  • 3rd downs - 4 of 12. 1st and 2nd down yardage continues to handicap this offense.
  • AJ Green - 3 catches, 50 yards. In the biggest game of the year, our most dynamic player should've had more touches.
  • Rushing - 33 carries, 121 yards. Modest results, but vastly improved run blocking.
  • Drew Butler - 52 yards a punt. Plus a very nice hold on Blair's 49 yard FG when Frix nearly snapped it over Butler's right shoulder.
  • Blair Walsh - Four KOs, one return for 19 yards. Three more touchbacks, despite Fabris.

Some Questions

  • Are Coach Willie and Bryan Evans married?
  • Does Bacarri Rambo spend each minute of practice cussing at coaches and giving them the finger?
  • Will Tebow finally break Walker's record against the Lamechickens or Florida International?
  • You know, the one it took Herschel 36 games to set and has taken Tebow roughly 50 games to match?
  • Is Brandon Spikes the dirtiest player to wear the scripted helmet?
  • Does Tenn Tech run the spread?

Lastly, I'm sure many fans will make a big deal of the costume change. I'll admit I liked the idea...but, I woulda kept the silver britches.

See ya tomorrow. I gotta get back to my pity party.