Monday, August 23, 2010

Monday's Meatloaf - Rankings...Mascots, Teams, Players and Wheels

I know, I know. You want me to be upset about this slap in the face. But truly, Uga being ranked the second best college mascot is not something to sneeze at casually. Number two in the nation is pretty good.

Ralphie's my bitch.
But Ralphie? Really? That endangered species has never graced the cover of Sports Illustrated. Plus...he's a GIRL

Check the Adam's apple.

But no, I'm not gonna get bent out of shape. After all, I remember what it's like to have too much buffalo dung to clean up. And really, we all know Uga's the best damn mascot to ever represent a team. He's stolen the silverscreen spotlight from John Cusack and Kevin Spacey and has been invited to the Heisman Trophy presentation.

And it's not like this AP decision is even legit. They supposedly ranked the coolest college mascots. Uga rests his manhood on a bag of ice. You can't get much cooler than that.

Today's Ingredients
  • Two weeks from today we'll be digesting what remains on the Cajuns. Three weeks out we'll either be slumping through the Monday post-loss doldrums...or failing to contain our unbridled enthusiasm.
  • The words preseason and poll are like oil and water. Why do they keep putting them together?
  • Garbin puts the peculiarity of Georgia's pre-season ranking into historical perspective.
  • Vance talked to some seniors about special teams and camp in general.
  • The Senator provides a voice to go with his words. Good stuff.
  • Hedges to Hardwood runs down the weekend that was in Athens.
  • Weiszer tells us Tampa Plant might already have a QB with Aaron Murray's school records in sight. At least it'll stay in the family.
  • ecdawg's Recruiting Update included a report of Coach Richt's newest Dream Team member.
  • AJ Green isn't good enough for Ivan Maisel's Heisman list, but he does make the top two in Rivals' WR preseason power rankings. If you'll allow me to pick a Uga up above, why is AJ not #1? More catches and yards than NotHer Dame's Michael Floyd. Plus, AJ juggles.
  • "I didn't want to be compared to him, but I feel like I made it my own." Brandon Boykin, on taking Asher's number. 
  • Terrific analysis by Exile on what basics Murray needs to master early.
  • MT has some evidence that LSwho wouldn't cut it in the Ivy know, should conference expansion go that far.
  • Spent so much time Friday laughing at the enginerds here and here, I totally missed that Coach PaJammies is down to bare bones behind that Nesbitt fella.
  • Speaking of Clean Old Fashioned Hate...this brought back some memories. (h/t Paige and Neil) My only argument is that the Tech band didn't win halftime in '92. You couldn't even hear them play over the boos. Some of which were coming from my only tech buddy sitting beside me.
  • So what now, are they trying to get me to feel sorry for Bellotti?
  • Lastly, in case you missed it yesterday: cheap tickets for you Braves fans for Sunday's game at Turner Field, Skin Cancer Awareness Day.

Successful Parking Attendant, ask Ferris.
Had the privilege of a very nice dinner out with the supper clubbers Saturday. We (literally) went to Market in Buckhead. And as usual, I out-ordered my bride. The strip steak with asparagus, shitake mushrooms and a soy-caramel sauce was almost as good as the cow I pull off my own grill.

After a week of being holed up at home without the wife and kids, it was nice to get out and stretch those social muscles. I didn't even mind when Cord went into his usual rant about being one of the original Goonies. 

But by the end of the evening the only thing being stretched was my patience. The valets had lost my car.

The manager (what do you have to do to become a manager of a valet stand, hold doors open for three consecutive years without slamming one on a patron's finger?) was the second and third to assure me it was being brought up forthwith. Since nearly 20 minutes had passed I questioned the truth of his assurance and watched him jog into the nether regions of the parking lot. Another 5 minutes passed and finally my car emerged.

It seems it had been found in the area of the parking lot rankings with the others receiving votes. As I drove home I had a clearer understanding of how South Carolina fans have felt all these years.

Here's your fork Reader. Have a great Monday. And be careful who you hand your keys to.



Fred said...

I't's just wrong. A menu item at Ted's Montana Grill won this poll??? I saw better looking cows at O'Malley's at closing time.

This is reDOGulous!!!

Russ the Undefeated is 10X better than Bevo with a bad hairpiece.

Bernie said...

Well said Fred.

Clarification on Bevo...he wasn't able to top the Stanford tree. So it's a foregone conclusion that Russ is way cooler than him. And in Boulder, he'll also take Ralphie out at the knees.

Just sayin'.