Friday, November 18, 2011

Friday misery, chapter 10: deep battered and Kentucky fried

So here we are, at the cusp of the SEC East title. We've spent the entire week patting ourselves on the back. Making ourselves feel nice and awesome after beating the everlovingshitoutof Abuurn. We're holding elevators for each other. High fiving. Picking up the lunch tab. Handing out contract extensions...

Slow your damn roll son.
This is my bourbon, and my ring.....which is
worth about $49 less than the bottle.
2009's Senior Day
Need I remind everyone? As nice as it was to savor the win last Saturday...the 2009 edition of Georgia/Kentucky tasted like ass. It too was the Saturday before Thanksgiving. Uga VII had just passed away. And just like this year, the students had left the team behind so they could spend some time with their mommies. To continue the trend, that game was also the Sanford season finale so there were seniors to acknowledge.

And we wet the bed.

Randall Cobb helped the Wildcats stretch their paws all over our second half defense then Ealey lost the handle on a toss sweep at the UK 1 yard line. There was much angst in the stands. Rich Brooks threw kitty litter in Richt's eyes. Pissed me the hell off. Ugh.

Blue grass stains
Quick! The only good things to come out of Kentucky?....bourbon...*chirp, chirp*

Looks like fish to me.
I would add Marshall Raylan Givens and his hottie Winona, but perhaps tv characters are a stretch. So I asked some folks last night for anything good that comes out of the blue grass state that doesn't rhyme with smourbon. I got A LOT more answers than I expected. Ranging from I-65 to beer to My Morning Jacket. Thanks to Gary, KellyJen, Hamp, Tyler, Brad, and Shan for kicking Wiki-Kentucky's ass. I'll acknowledge them as a worthwhile and necessary state in our great union. They have good music, horses that are fast enough to take your wallet, and they evidently invented the art of frying chicken. Or at least claim to.

But you know what? Screw that! They're still worthless. My doctor says to eat more fish, my wife has my wallet...and my bar has enough bourbon to last until 2012. I think.

Compare this!
It's also been a week to compare seasons. Richt was asked earlier to assume we win the East and then compare this season to other seasons in which we went to Atlanta. Writers and bloggers have jumped on board, some understandably cautiously and others with the fearlessness of a drunk pissing on a cop's pants leg.

C'mon, let's huddle up here a moment so I can darken the sunshine that's been blowing up your ass...we ain't won shit! You know how sweet that Auburn win will taste if we stub our toe against the Joker? Think back to the South Carolina loss a couple months ago and add about two stadium cups full of piss and vinegar. 

Yeh, that bad. So come to Athens ready to fight Dawgs. Bring a cooler, but put some business in it and let's put our best foot forward. There's work left to be done. 

Go Dawgs!


Big Muddy Dawg said...

Dang, Bernie keeping it real!

On a side note, I don't think I've ever used the phrases "if we make it", "should things occur such that", and "please, please, please let us beat Kentucky" so many times in a such a short time span.

BourbonDawg said...

Ummm...bourbon. Glad that Cobb kid finally finished matriculating. He was there for nearly a full decade it seemed. US Marshall Raylan Givens may have been the only one that could stop him.

VeraColvin said...

It's now getting near the end of the 2011 Football season. Georgia has made it into the post season bowl games. I've got Outback Bowl tickets for this year, and I'm looking forward to the game. Go 'Dawgs!

Bernie said...

As sweet as curb-stomping Abuurn was. A win tomorrow would be even tastier.

shakerag said...

Outstanding blog
The best thing about Ky is that it's not In