Monday, December 31, 2012

Monday Misery - looking for something more

Decided in the interest of time to throw the what to look for post in with the misery. This is a trick I learned in a Blogging 204 class my second year at Georgia. It provides compact quality content while also saving the reader time.

Yes, you're welcome. Now, let's get on with it.

A five yard hangover
Still hungover from the Georgia Dome. I admit that. You do too, right? It's been nearly a full month and I've gone about my day to day obligations and functions almost seamlessly. However, I'm still sitting there having watched that last tick drain. My elbows are on my knees and my chin is resting in the palms of my hands. The confetti rains down and the Georgia players are dejectedly aimed towards the locker room.

Say hullo to my LIL friend Nicky!
While the rest of the world makes their resolutions, we are resigned to this fate. We'll be stuck in this hell for eternity. Always wondering, hoping and wishing for an alternate ending.

What's worse is that if we feel like this then imagine how the team feels? Imagine the task the coaches have in motivating the players for a game in Orlando. While the Dawgs are dining with Minnie Mouse and Goofy, Saban and his minions are living it up in Tony Montana's crib. We get spinning teacups and seven dwarfs, they get Crockett, Tubbs and all the coked out whores they can handle.

Somehow we have to put aside our grief, our abject misery for 60 minutes and play tackle football against Nebraska. Put a pot of coffee on. On second thought, just set aside a second handle of bourbon. Perhaps we'll just drink our way through it. Hair of the dawg as they say.

So, you want to know what to look for? Well here ya go:
  • Nebraska sucks. They're like maybe the fourth or fifth best team in their conference. I'm not sure what that conference is, but it's not the SEC where 4th or 5th best team is someone to be reckoned with. 
  • Understand that the first bullet is there to warn you of two things: we could blow these kids out of the water, or you could be especially frustrated if we play down to their level and lose this damn game. Either way, you've been warned.
  • They have a semi-hispanic mobile quarterback. He must be contained like a rogue frijole wrapped inside a burrito.
  • Our defensive line may or may not be ready to play this game. Jenkins found an "I" in "TEAM" and Abry is looking at spot duty. Nebraska averages 73 plays a game. If they come close to that total we could be in trouble. Our defense has to get them off the field. Quick. 
  • Again...frijole...burrito...contained...and smothered in Jarvis sauce.
  • Bobo wants to get Keith Marshall the ball more. Which means he doesn't mind scoring quickly. I don't either. However, some nice methodical 12 minute drives would be nice as well.
  • Our offense will score at will. In short, Pelini's "Blackshirts" have holes in them that give Coach Osborne nightmares.
Other than that, give DickSamIV the ball running downhill a few more times and then we'll just wait on Aaron Murray's press conference. Not to mention August 31st, when we finally get to make out with this sexy lady we call College Football again.

Happy New Year Reader! Go Dawgs! Shuck em good now y'all!