Monday, January 14, 2013

Monday's Meatloaf - a Pepertual round Tuit

One of these days will be here one of these days, so why not now?

It's one thing to make accommodations for the pile of clothes we left on the floor, the one we continue to step around and over. Not to mention that broken mailbox, the toilet that always needs the handle jiggled and that deck board that needs to be tightened down. But what about real, daily interactions that always get the back burner? The phone calls and visits that get pushed back simply because we ran out of time before we laid our head down?
Wear it wisely, or
hide it carefully.

When I was a kid I remember finding a round, yellow button in my dad's tool box. On it was just four letters - TUIT. I'd seen it a thousands times probably, but one day decided I'd finally ask him what the heck it meant. I guess part of the reason I waited so long to ask was that I had this funny feeling that it might be something dirty or inappropriate.

Turns out it wasn't. Just palpable procrastination. "Oh that," Dad said. "That's for when I need to get around to it." He paused before checking to see if the humor had set in. It hadn't yet, but when it finally did I chuckled and wondered if mom knew he was hiding his round "tuit" somewhere she would never look.

Which proves that while we are the weaker sex, men can win a battle from time to time. But that's a lesson for another day. For today I'm giving each of you a round Tuit. Use it often and by all means use it wisely. And when not in use, hide it somewhere safe.

You're welcome.

Today's Ingredients
- First off, if you comment on the blog you should find that easier to do now. Especially if you use a mobile device. For some reason those weren't always posting, but I think I've got it ironed out now. Just click on Glory Glorys link once it loads. Your patience has been appreciated.
- The Lady Dogs won a defensive battle at Stegeman yesterday over South Carolina.
- But the men's team continues to find new levels of disappointment.
- In that regard, Tyler sees history repeating itself. Ugh. Truth cuts like a knife.
- Also, here's hoopdawg's reaction and roundup from the o-2 conference start. And evidently Daugman couldn't even watch.
- In the wake of the news that the Hokies courted Bobo, McGarity explained to Weiszer what the timeline will be for any assistants' raises.
- The Lady Sportswriter has the latest news on safety recruit Shaq Fluker.
- Great stuff from Emerson on Blair Walsh's turn around this season, all the way to the record books and the NFL Pro Bowl. And also catch this piece where Walsh says he'd be happy to talk to Coach Richt about how a special teams coach may or may not have helped.
- Lastly, happy belated birthday to friend of the blog, David Hale. Sorry we forgot.

Are you like me in that you get daily updates on who has been arrested in your zip code? Our county sheriff sends them to me via email each morning. (Speaking of Sheriff Conway, remind me to tell you about the time he used a dentist on trial for murder to shut a pesky parent up. If you live in Gwinnett, you already have a jump start on next week's meatloaf.) I originally signed up for this notification service to keep track of my sketchy neighbors potential dangers to my home and family. But it also provides occasional entertainment.

The hands of pepertuality.
And that is how I came to know of a young lady named Pepertual. Somewhere and sometime after MTv decided to change from a music video channel to a "reality tv" smorgasbord of loose morals and instant gratification (GET OFF MY LAWN!!) parents also started using their children's names as expressions of free speech and ways of hoarding attention. Sally became Shitheadra and Billy became HaHa Clinton Dix. And of course Earlene Jo Betty Mae became Honey Boo-Boo.

So Pepertual's parents never sniffed the first round of their 3rd grade spelling bee, but they still had a feeling that their darling daughter would gangsta hard 4ever. Perpetually you might say. Or maybe their aspirations were higher than that, believing that she would one day star on a season of "Real Housewives of Badderyless Watches" as the one that steals the completely organic scenes involving reckless driving of an electric vehicle and terroristic acts of endless identity theft. We know unique names on shows of that nature are more likely to spike the ratings, which in turn leads to B movie roles, nail polish endorsement deal$ and their own Wiki page.

Of course, now I realize that with a name that is attached to the likes of Madoff and Ebbers I have little room to cast stones at Ms. Pepertual. If I were a lawyer I'd represent her pro bono...once I got a round tuit of course.

Go have a Monday Reader. Stop perpetually slacking off.